Tag: United Parcel Service

The latest UPS fuck up

Well – it seems UPS still lives up to the Shit Wrapped in Chiffon name. I’m of the opinion they made a huge mistake ever becoming more than a metropolitan delivery service. That’s what they were prior to being an international logistics firm and I use the term logistics loosely.

At work I’d ordered an Apple Magic Trackpad for one of the developers. It was supposed to have been delivered on the 12th of November. That comes and goes, no package. It did get delivered on the 18th, six whole days later and one semi-fun phone call to UPS.

Now this is UPS in the Boston, MA area. And the office is located in the same building as the Boston Children’s Museum. So it’s not like it’s some out of the way place.
But I digress – I called UPS on the 17th. They first offered to drop it at a pickup location. Fuck UPS and their pickup locations and I’ll explain why. If I wanted to wait around for 20 minutes while they go through all the packages I’d go for their pickup locations. But fuck UPS.

I explained to the service droid that we were a commercial business and we didn’t do pickup locations. Then I explained to her where we were, what the building was and that we were on the 5th floor, at the far end of the corridor.

And don’t you know the package got delivered on the 18th. But the fact I had to call UPS and bitch them out a bit – that wasn’t necessary.

Annual Rant: Where UPS once again proves they are Shit Wrapped in Chiffon

So I ordered some powdered sour cream and powdered buttermilk. I use a lot of dairy and the powdered form is shelf stable so I ordered them on Amazon.

One shipped United States Postal Service, the powdered buttermilk in fact. It arrived today. The other shipped via UPS.

Here’s what was waiting on my door when I got home at 6PM:

New UPS InfoNotice

So they’ll leave it at a store several blocks away when there is a functional retail store right around the corner from me. But they aren’t a UPS drop stop. It’s funny I’d heard tell of these new info-notices and when I bought the powdered sour cream I didn’t think to see how they’d ship. Had I done so I would not have ordered it from the vendor. Because this is a consistent issue with UPS.

So I have to go out of MY way to get my package? Really? I find it awfully funny that UPS will deliver a 37lb refrigerator right to my office but when it comes to delivering a little 1lb package to my house it’s all hyper vigilance about leaving a package on my porch, but they’ll deliver things right to my desk at work.

It pretty much tells you who UPS would rather serve. It’s awfully funny for a company that got it’s start as a retail package runner in Chicago that they cannot understand that in the time it takes to write their annoying little info-notices they could have just delivered the package and saved themselves my ire. It’s been a while since I had to go down to UPS in Warwick and rip them a new asshole. I’m feeling the urge to do so again soon. I mean the last time I had to go down there I think I had to utter the words “Go Fuck Yourself” at least once. I need to have a tirade again where I can utter several variant of the word ‘fuck’ while I’m at a UPS facility.

UPS once again proves that they are Shit Wrapped in Chiffon

So I ordered a pair of spike stabilizers from LL Bean as it is getting slushy, icy around here. Now LL Bean is in Maine – just a stones throw from here relatively speaking. And it moved pretty quickly as evidenced below:

Tracking Details
DateScan Activity
Now it was supposed to be delivered yesterday. In fact where that 8:43PM entry there was one at 5:24AM – in fact it’s still there and they changed it to Destination Scan from  saying it was on the truck and out for delivery.
Now here’s the rub – Emergency Situation is a catch all. And the Severe Weather Condition – well yesterday we were all dug out, so no issue getting here. I think the driver saw the snow banks and decided it wasn’t worth delivering. A one pound package.
Meanwhile I’d ordered a couple items on Amazon. They shipped United States Postal Service. And they were delivered exactly when they said they’d be delivered. Including the texts from Amazon telling me so.

So what exactly is UPS’s problem? I urge every vendor I deal with to not ship things to me via UPS because invariably they don’t deliver to my address, in an urban area, in the capital city with a main street that crosses mine and three functioning business right around the corner from me.

Yes, UPS is in fact Shit Wrapped in Chiffon. And they don’t know or love logistics, what  UPS does know is how to fuck things up beyond all recognition. That’s UPS version of logistics.

UPS: Know what REALLY pissed me off today?

The fact the UPS thinks they are the custodian of MY PROPERTY! That’s right the box and its contents were MY PROPERTY to do with what I please. That the bitch had the temerity to chase after me. Fuck her and UPS. They were simply the intermediary that I did not choose. 

Their excuses are laughable – signature required. They’ve done this to me before even though the SHIPPER didn’t request it. Fuck them. 

It’s my property – deliver it or you get the ration of shit from me. It’s that simple. But again and again UPS can’t seem to figure out that I want my packages to be delivered with no fuss, no muss nothing. If I have to go out of my way to claim my property then you’re gonna be told to go and fuck yourself. It’s that simple. 

I’m pretty ruthless with carriers and vendors. Part of it is that I know my shit and when they try to make it sound like I’m an idiot, it doesn’t go over well. Upon further reflection I should have signed the thing with “Go Fuck Yourself UPS!”. 

And I’ve been checking the track on the package, it’s still showing as held for pickup. Ha ha ha ha ha! 

UPS – no thanks!

So I went and waited over 40 minutes to get my package. About 20 was waiting in line another 20 for the woman to find the package. 

So as I pick it up the woman says “I need to see your ID”. I answered “No you do not.” Then it was “I need you to sign for the package” to which I replied “No I won’t. “

The woman had the temerity to follow me out in the parking lot at which point I told her to go fuck herself. I had my package, I don’t care if I fuck up your logistics system. 

So I got my sneakers. I contacted Reebok – they only ship UPS or Fedex. I guess I won’t be doing business with them again. 

UPS: So as of 10AM this morning

I’m going down to their depot in Warwick, RI at 150 Plan Way. They say my package is there. We’ll just see about that. This time I printed off the tracking page so I can slap it on the counter and say “Find my fucking package!”

They really are living up to the name Shit Wrapped in Chiffon. What can Brown do for you indeed? And they love the logistics of not delivering packages. 

I’ll update this later on. But what I find most boggling – that the item showed as out for delivery at 8:08AM but didn’t get the address error until 5:03PM. That’s awfully convenient. Nine plus hours in which they could have just delivered the fucking package. 

This is why despite the warts I love the United States Postal Service. They don’t play games. They get the job done. And honestly if the package is large they’ll simply leave me a tag on the door and I’ll go down and pick it up. The post office is about a mile from here. The UPS depot is 7.5 miles away. You see my point now don’t you. 




Yet another UPS Sucks Post

UPS still sucksSo I ordered a pair of sneakers. Track said they’d be here today. But guess what, no package. I check the UPS status and see this:

Yeah I’m not happy. I’m on hold right now but I plan to rip them a fucking new one. Why do vendors use this Shit Wrapped in Chiffon shipper? Attention Reebok — I hate UPS with a burning passion.

And more to the point, look at the attached image. Notice it left Warwick at 8:08AM but the address exception didn’t take place until nearly 6PM in the evening.

I ripped into them on the phone. Didn’t swear all that much, did yell a few times though. So now I have to go out of my way to pick up the package tomorrow. I’ve already let the folks at Reebok know I’m not a happy camper. I’ll likely get the shipping charge reversed.

But the fact I have to go through this nearly every time UPS tries to deliver something says a hell of a lot. They claim to love logistics. The only logistics they love is how they can fuck with their customers. Because they certainly can’t locate an address next door to a business that they regularly deliver to and pick up from and it’s the same driver who delivers to me. So they’re blowing smoke up my ass and I don’t appreciate it.

And funny of funnies – when I was on the phone with the rep I said that UPS is famous for tag and run but that this is a new twist on the theme. I got an acknowledgement on that one. So they know the drivers pull this shit.

Now to be fair the drivers they do stuff those trucks pretty full. And I can understand how they might blow a 2 day delivery because a next day job took priority. But be honest with your customers.

I mean in the past I’ve had UPS representatives say that residential deliveries happened after 5PM, then 7PM. But then the next day they’d try to deliver the package at 1:30 in the afternoon. Shit like that.

And it’s funny, I’ve been head hunted for positions in their I.T. department. I’ve turned them down every time. I don’t want to be a piece of a what was once a local delivery business in Chicago that has now grown to such a size that it’s like an unwieldy beast. Like a Hyrda with eight heads, none of which know what any of the others is doing.

Where once again UPS forgets what logistics are and how to deliver a package

So I ordered a call blocker on Amazon. The vendor decided to ship via UPS. I mean the whole thing weighs .9 pounds. The Postal Service could have delivered it.

So yesterday I get an alert email from UPS My Choice – that they tried to deliver but nobody was there. So I called UPS and ripped them a new one. I really should record my calls with UPS because I’m told I’m pretty assertive with them. They’d make for an amusing listen that’s for sure.

So later yesterday they call me back. Driver is already in. I asked the question, was the package shipped with signature requested? No it was not. So I asked why then did the driver not just leave the package in front of the door. Postal service has no problem doing that. I made sure to mention that to him. He says UPS policy allows drivers discretion in multi-unit dwellings. I live in a two family home. It’s not a big complex and I told the guy this. I told him that I’d heard varying quotations on UPS policy over the years but none that gave the drivers any discretion over whether or not to leave a package. In fact next door to me is a business that gets almost DAILY deliveries and pickups from UPS. So it shouldn’t be so hard for them to deliver a package weighing less then a pound RIGHT NEXT DOOR.

The upshot is I told the guy I don’t care what they do – deliver the package. And that the next time I dealt with the vendor I’d specify US Postal Service.

It’s one thing that this happens on occasion – but every fucking time? Come on UPS – if you really Love Logistics you should be better than that.